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Joke of the Week #17
submitted by Judy Hurvitz
Two for the price of one:
1. Moishe is driving in Jerusalem.
He's late for a meeting. He's looking for a parking place, and can't find one. In desperation, he turns towards heaven and says, "G-d, if you find me a parking spot I promise that I'll eat only kosher, I'll respect Shabbas and all the holidays."
Miraculously, a place opens up just in front of him. He turns his face up to heaven and says, "Never mind, I just found one."
2. As you may know, in a slalom race the skier must pass through about 20 "gates" in the fastest time. Well, it happened that Israel had the fastest slalom skier in the world and had great expectations for an Olympic gold medal.
Came the day of the final, the crowd waited in anticipation. The French champion sped down the course in 38 seconds. The Swiss in 38.7 seconds, the German in 37.8 seconds and the Italian in 38.1 seconds. Next came the Israeli's turn ... the crowd waited, and waited...SIX MINUTES!!!
"What happened to you?" screamed his trainer when the Israeli finally arrived. Replied the exhausted Israeli: "It’s not my fault! Someone put a mezuzah on each gate!"
Shabbat Morning Service
